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Birth Stories

Tamsin’s Story - The Birth of Lucy Niamh

My husband and I decided before we even got pregnant that this time we were going to book an independent midwife. It took us a while to save up but it meant so much to us not to have to use the NHS again.

In my first pregnancy the first seven months was in Wales and I have nothing but praise for the care I received there; the birth was in Kent and again the care was outstanding. My second pregnancy was in Worcestershire and I found the local attitudes of medicalisation and the bullying of those who don’t dance to their tune very hard to deal with; I felt I had to fight for everything I wanted. I felt no one would listen to me. I had to repeat my wishes to every new face I came up against and it wore me out – this time round I could just not face that again. The icing on the cake was that in the end no one came to me when I was in labour and I ended up birthing with no medical person present at all! Something I could not risk happening again, so we employed Diane.

Diane has cared for me throughout the pregnancy and I now consider her as much a friend as a care giver. I was two weeks overdue and Diane had no problem with me going over that, because she knew I wanted to listen to my own body and that I had every confidence I would labour naturally when my baby was ready. I started having the odd twinge a few days before but I knew it was just ‘gearing up’ rather than a sign of imminent labour. At midnight on the 1st May I had what felt like strong period pains, and then I had a show. I went to bed pleased that I had a sign that things were finally moving. I woke at 5am and recognized the cramping was feeling much more like labour pains now. By 6am I was feeling really uncomfortable and no longer able to sleep, at 7am I felt a ‘clunk’ and the discomfort disappeared. I assumed it was the head engaging and dozed off again, at 8am I went to the loo and discovered the clunk had not been the head engaging at all but my waters breaking. Jason had just rung Diane to tell her that I was having early labour pains so I rang her back to let her know about the waters. She asked if I wanted her to attend but I said no I needed to get breakfast and get the kids off to school. Diane said that she would base herself in Evesham for the day and check in regularly. I was touched by this, it gave me the reassurance that she would be there for me when she was needed. Once the kids were dispatched Jay set up the birthpool in the sitting room and started to fill it. At midday Diane came to check me out and said everything was fine and as things were not getting going properly yet, she was going to take the opportunity to go home and rest. She advised me to go for a walk. I had a rather tentative walk with Jason around the Cheltenham Road, down Davies Road and cutting through the leisure centre car park, stopping every few minutes to cope with a contraction. I was finding the constant trickle of fluid very annoying and used up half a pack of maternity pads. My waters had not broken until later on with the other two and so I had not had to put up with it before. Then Jason had to go for the girls and labour had to be put on the backburner because we were soon back into the routine of making tea, listening to reading books, bathing the kids and telling bedtime stories (with the older one asking every so often why mummy was making funny noises!). They were packed off to bed early and once they were settled my labour really stepped up a gear.

At 8pm Diane checked in with me and I asked her to come out to me. When she arrived she asked how I was and I told her I was thinking about putting the Tens machine on. Diane said that the rule with the Tens machine is if you are thinking about putting it on then it is time to put it on. I wished I had put it on two hours before. She said that I was about 3-4 cm dilated. I spent the next few hours on my birth ball and walking round and breathing through the contractions whilst ‘boosting’ the Tens.

About half 10 I went to the loo and found a pale brown stain on the pad I had been wearing: I realized it was probably meconium and so I went down to tell Diane – she agreed it was and so we discussed the implications. I knew that the odds of there being meconium in the waters was very high with a baby who is 16 days overdue and so decided to hang on at home for a while and then reassess. The next time I checked the fluid was clear again.

Diane Suggested I get into the pool. I really did not want to part with the Tens but the support of the water felt good.

I don’t remember much of being in the pool – I went into myself and have no concept of time from then on. The contractions were now very intense and there was very little respite between them but before long I was pushing. I felt the head crown and began to doubt that I could do it. Jason knew that meant that the baby was about to be born – because he has heard it before – I said it at every birth. I remember asking him to help me (quite what I wanted him to do I am not sure, magically take the pain away and make the baby’s head smaller I think). He gave me a big hug and then looked me in the eye and said “ yes you can, you are doing brilliantly and I am so proud of you”. This gave me the boost I needed and I remember asking the time, it was quarter to 12. I remember thinking “Right Tamsin 15 minutes. If you get a move on, the baby will be born on Keith’s (Jay’s dad) 60th birthday.” I gave a few good pushes and she was soon born. I remember Diane asking me if I could feel the head and thinking that was a bit of an odd thing to say, I said “no born”, she looked a bit puzzled and asked me to repeat it. I said “baby born” she fished down but the cord was round the baby’s neck and it was very short so I had to move so that Diane could unravel her. Lucy came into the world at 11.53. Keith was thrilled to bits to be rung a few minutes later to tell him he has to share his birthday. The girls got up at 7am to find they had a new baby sister (and a day off school), at 10am Pip (friend) came round (and cried) then I emailed everyone to say I had a great labour with no pain relief and that Lucy was very chilled out and lovely, later that day I even pottered down the road to vote in the election!

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